2025年3月18日 星期二

Report on Modern Corporate Ideals: A Civil Service Perspective

 To: The Rt. Hon. Sir Keir Starmer, KCB, KC, MP, Prime Minister

From: Sir Humphrey Appleby, GCB, MVO, MA (Oxon)

Subject: Report on Modern Corporate Ideals: A Civil Service Perspective

Prime Minister,

I have, as instructed, reviewed the provided document outlining the characteristics of a company aligning with the ideals of this... Shibusawa Eiichi 渋沢 栄一. It appears to be a somewhat idealistic, perhaps even utopian, vision of corporate behaviour. One might even venture to say, without undue cynicism, that it is a view more suited to a seminar room than a boardroom.

Let us examine these "characteristics," shall we?

  • "A Clearly Defined Purpose Beyond Profit": A laudable sentiment, Prime Minister, but one fraught with practical difficulties. While we can all agree that contributing "positively to society" is desirable, the definition of "positive" is, shall we say, subject to interpretation, and often, political expediency. Furthermore, relegating profit to a mere "means" rather than an "end" is, in my considered opinion, akin to suggesting that the engine of a motor car is secondary to the paint job. Necessary, perhaps, but certainly not the primary objective.

  • "Strong Ethical Governance": Transparency, accountability, and ethical conduct are, of course, to be encouraged. However, one must remember that excessive transparency can be detrimental to efficient decision-making. The less people know, the less they can object. And accountability, well, that often leads to inquiries, and inquiries, Prime Minister, are rarely conducive to smooth governance. Ethical conduct, naturally, is vital, provided it doesn't impede our ability to... maneuver.

  • "Stakeholder Orientation": A dangerous notion, Prime Minister. Considering the interests of all stakeholders? This sounds suspiciously like a dilution of responsibility. The shareholders, after all, are the ones who own the company, and it is their interests that should, quite rightly, take precedence. The others? Well, they can always lobby, can't they?

  • "Investment in People and Society": Philanthropy and environmental stewardship are undoubtedly commendable. However, one must bear in mind that these activities are, at their core, exercises in public relations. They are investments designed to improve the company's image, which, in turn, benefits the shareholders. Let us not mistake altruism for astute marketing.

  • "Long-Term Vision": Long-term vision is, of course, desirable. However, in the political sphere, and indeed in the corporate world, one must often prioritize short-term gains. After all, what is the point of a long-term vision if you are not around to see it realized? One must be pragmatic, Prime Minister. One must be... strategically short-sighted.

  • "Continuous Improvement with a Moral Compass": A "moral compass," you say? I would suggest that a flexible compass, one that can be adjusted to navigate the ever-changing currents of the market, is a far more valuable tool. Ethical considerations are important, but they should not be allowed to obstruct the pursuit of... strategic advantage.

In conclusion, Prime Minister, while these ideals may be admirable in theory, their practical application is, shall we say, fraught with potential pitfalls. The realities of modern business demand a certain... flexibility, a certain willingness to compromise, and a certain... degree of pragmatism. Let us not be swayed by idealistic notions that might undermine our ability to compete effectively in the global marketplace.

I trust this is helpful, Prime Minister.

Yours in Service,

Sir Humphrey Appleby.